Recently, Inspector General of Police, Mister Mike Okiro, told members of the House of Representatives, that Nigeria might harvest a plethora of horse and dog deaths, unless he is given the approval to spend the chicken change of seven hundred and sixty-seven point five million naira, as the feeding allowance for the dogs and horses that he keeps on behalf of all of us! Unfortunately, the media didn’t report just how many reps went for the handkerchiefs in their pockets to wipe the tears from their faces, as the nation’s chief cop made his plea, which should ordinarily win him an award from animal rights organisations for compassion. Unfortunately for Mister Okiro, his plea resembles a hastily buried corpse, with the unfortunate consequence that a foot is sticking out of the ground!
In the 1970s and 1980s, it was true that the Nigerian police had well nurtured dogs sections around the country, as well as very well-kept horses. But like a lot of things in Nigeria, the dogs sections gradually deteriorated and almost collapsed. I am not in possession of any information which showed that Mister Okiro gave an inventory of the number of dogs and horses that will need to be fed with the chicken change of N767.5million. But given the not-too-pleasant reputation of the police in matters financial, it might be that those handling the dogs and horses might also end up being fed along with their animals, with the chicken change that Oga Okiro has passionately pleaded for. The main issue here is that he might just get the entire amount anyway and Okiro will then be able to shout DEO GRATIAS as many times as the number of dogs and horses there are in police pens around Nigeria! But not all of us believe these yarns about dogs and horses that need almost N800 million just to feed in one year (and the ridiculous threat that they risked death if that chicken change is not approved!), even if they will be fed with diamonds, Oga Okiro!